


Lily Potter’s Vase

by olly_octopus



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, M/M, also i happen to think im hilarious, also sorry I put the drarry tag, but I do write drarry, check out my other stuff x, im tired and gay give me a break, there’s no drarry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-09-28 00:20:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17172281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/olly_octopus/pseuds/olly_octopus
Summary: Snape crawls over literal dead bodies and ignores a crying infant while the house is on fire so that he can cuddle his dead crush. Olly thinks he’s funny, and wrote about it. Humour him.





	Lily Potter’s Vase

**Author's Note:**

> I got a gay pride wristband for Christmas

“Oh, Lily,” groans Snape, humping the vase filled with pretty limp flowers that haven’t been watered or gotten any moisture in a few days. This Will Change In The Next Thirty Seconds.  
“Aye bro,” says baby Harry, having miraculously stopped crying and gained the ability to speak simply to stare in disgust at Snivellous. “That’s my dead mum there, lying on the floor, that you crawled over my dad’s dead body to cry over. And that’s her vase.”  
Snape gives an anguished moan and comes all over the vase and flowers. The flowers instantly crumble into dust and blow away like Tom Holland’s Spider-Man in Avengers, Infinity War (2018). Snape is still crying. 

“Dude—“ says Baby Harry in a voice that kind of sounds like the author’s head of year after discovering the author’s school meme Instagram account, except that he doesn’t get the chance to finish because Snape has already moved on to humping Lily’s wardrobe.  
“Seriously, man?”  
“This is where she keeps all her sexy lingerie,” cries Snape, trying to keep a steady grip on the sides of the wardrobe with his thighs.   
“And my tiny little fucking baby socks,” points out Harry. Snape humps harder.  
“Christ,” says Harry.

Snape ejaculates and searches around frantically for something else that had vague links to Lily to hump.

“Bro, you’ve already fucked everything in this room,” says Harry, exasperated. “There’s literally nothing else for you to— FUCK, MAN, THAT’S MY DAD!!!”  
“HE’S BEEN INSIDE LILY,” screeches Snape from on top of James Potter.

**Author's Note:**

> Please give me comments and kudos for no other reason than because 1) you love me really and 2) because you’re impressed I had the will to live to write even 253 words of this thanks x


End file.
